Ugh, it's election season again. Why does it have to happen so damn often? I'm starting to think Socrates was right about this whole "democracy" bullshit.
I'm a severely unpatriotic person, and I'm glad that I can say it here because I can't say it anywhere else. I don't know why, but all Americans are patriotic to some degree, and not just the stereotypical ones you're thinking of. I mean all of them, yes, even the libs. Most Americans, genuinely, truly think America is the greatest country, which shows how well traveled Americans are. Despite how much Americans love America, we can hardly list the things so great about it besides vague sentiments like "freedom" or "liberty". For many white liberals, a common narrative is that the country is "going to shit", that Trump and Maga is the worst thing to happen to this country. That's an ignorant sentiment. This country was always shit, it didn't go anywhere, it just went around in a circle. This country was founded on the genocide of it's natives, our first few presidents were all slave masters, and one of our current candidates definitely owns a few sweatshops.
Back to the original point: What do I hate so much about elections? Well, it doesn't actually have too much to do with the elections themselves. If every election was simply an event every four years when Americans could be given the illusion of choice while nothing actually changes, I'd be perfectly fine with that. I've reached almost a Zen Buddhist level of peace in my heart, knowing that suffering is something I can't escape from. I will leave this world as I came, crying. What I really hate about elections is that I don't live alone. You see, while I'm over here trying to find a good study tree to reach enlightenment under, my family has been occupied with filling up every atom in our home with the sound of conservative news outlets. Yeah, yeah, it's the common plight of being the only lefty in a family full of right wingers.
In every group, there's the majority, and the minority. You should never let people find common ground on anything, because once they do, they will congregate and become powerful. Alone in my family, I feel like such a fish out of water, I can't even think of a clever metaphor... A cactus out of sand? A cloud out of the sky? Hmm... Maybe a ghost out of a haunted mansion. Yeah, that one. I feel like a ghost. I'm not just watched over, I'm watched through. My parents will happily discuss their bigoted beliefs with me right there in the room, despite the fact they know it makes me uncomfortable. Why? Because majority rules. I, the lone minority, say nothing at all. If my family knew a fraction of the shit I believed in, they would think I'm a domestic terrorist.
I'm actually not that leftist, all things considered. It's not because I disagree with aspects of leftist ideology, I just haven't dove that deep into it. Maybe if I decided to learn about communism for realsies one day, I'll find it very structurally sound and I'd become a communist. Or maybe, I'd think it's nonsense and move on. However, I've never put in that work, and I don't plan to. Why do I not plan to? Because to put it simply, ignorance is bliss. If I found myself agreeing with those works, I'd only further alienate myself from my family, become a further outcast in society, become more politically engaged... And for what? An idea. The day America becomes communist is the day every McDonalds in this country shuts down- it's never gonna happen. Hope is a worm on a hook.
This was a rant. Rants reflect a person's emotions, but not that person fully. Despite how I depict myself as some grumpy doomer, I'm not just that. Once I'm done with my little rant, I'll go back to the real world. I'll donate to charity, I'll vote, I'll argue. Why do I even bother with these meaningless tasks when I know it'd all amount to nothing? I don't know. The closest answer I've come up with is survival instinct. It's in our DNA to survive, and part of survival is maintaining hope. The logical side of my brain tells me to just lay down and let the universe take me, but the emotion one fights to stay. Survival is so hardwired into us, you'd flinch before you even processed what hit you. I think of my altruism as a flinch, it's just the monkey instincts taking over. I'll never fully understand why I do it, still. Monkey instincts, monkey instincts.
Note: I've been trying to figure out what is the right amount of information I should dispel about myself. At the start of this site, I was very caught up on the idea of anonymity. I didn't want anyone to know anything about me, not my name, my race, my nationality, my gender, my shoe size, nothing. Now, I realize that's dumb. How the hell am I gonna write about myself and my life and also not say anything about myself? So, some information has to be given up. It's still very uncomfortable to me, as I have little to no social media experience and being "seen" in any public space scares me, but it's worth it. I think. Also, I wrote about the election partly because it forces publish this thing before the results are out. If you're reading this, hopefully I succeeded. Also, hopefully the US hasn't crumbled like the Roman Empire by then. See ya.
The many phrases we use in place of saying that someone is dead, such as "passed away" or "is no longer with us" always sort of... rubbed me in a weird way. I understand the need for these phrases, and telling someone, "sorry about your dead grandma" can sound a tad insensitive. However, I've started to question why that is exactly, why we hate talking about death directly. Is it really about respect, or is it because of something else.. Something like fear?
As I am writing this, we are currently entering fall. Fall is the season of dying. It's right there in the name. Everywhere you go, beautiful crinkly dead matter scatters the ground. But that's not to say that fall is the only time when things die. Truly, there is death everywhere, all the time. Your skin cells are dying right now, and so is a star billions of light years away, and the key ingredient in your future hotdog.
However, despite the ubiquitous nature of death, most of us in the modern world are entirely removed from it. Some... More than others, but all of us, more than we should be. Like most things that are designed to go unnoticed, once you notice it, it's everywhere. The subtle ways we try to eliminate even the smallest reminders of death, is one of those things.
An animal that we will never know, is slaughtered somewhere inside a factory we will never see. All we see is the end product: a perfectly packaged piece of meat, devoid of the animal it was.
A person who has taken their last breath has begun the process of decay. We will not see this either, of course. What we will see will be a neatly arranged corpse laying in the casket, pumped full of chemicals and covered in makeup to masquerade the rot. It's pretty grotesque, actually.
By the way, my birthday is coming soon. I feel like shit, thank you for asking. Realistically speaking, dying of old age is something I will not have to worry about for a very, very long time. However, the reminder that the clock is ticking still doesn't make me feel great. Our attempts to hide ourselves from death also includes hiding ourselves from aging, and that's were the first big problem comes in.
Generally speaking, we totally hate old people. We give them the same treatment we do to prisoners, relegating them to the outskirts of society where nobody has to be reminded that they exist. If you particularly feel no love for your elders, you might push them into a senior retirement home. We close the door to any older person looking for a career, as being "young" is an unspoken requirement in most jobs.
We do all of this to shield ourselves from facing reality. Modern human life is so far removed from nature, that we often think of ourselves as being fully removed from nature. We put humans in a different category than animals, as if we’re on a higher plain of existence. Through agriculture, medicine, houses and air conditioners, we’ve eradicated anything we consider “unpleasant”. Except death. We can never beat death. No matter what happens, we will always just be animals, destined to rot.